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Jul
16
Title:  Turn Up The Heat On First Dates With These Conversation Starters
Author:   jcabrera1981  |  Location: TEXAS
Date: 07/16/2017      

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jcabrera1981
Wanted to share some of my tips and techniques for turning up the heat on a first date. Trust me these work!

GET DOWN TO IT
Life is too short for there to be taboo topics. I say put it all out there so as not to waste time. You want passion in your relationship? Talk about topics of substance. Religious views, politics, sexual preferences...everything you were always told NOT to talk about on a first date are the conversation topics that will really enable you to see if you're going to be compatible with and potentially connect with a person in the long run. Why wait till the third or fourth date to find out that they voted for Trump? Seriously, do you have that kind of time to waste?

SHARE DATING "HORROR STORIES"
You don't necessarily want to dive into your recent divorce or how your college sweetheart broke your heart and you're still in therapy trying to get over it. However, relating on a "single in the city" level is a good thing. If you met online ask what their worst online date was. I'm sure you've had your share of bad dates as well. This topic should provide much entertainment value and give you insight into your date, giving you the knowledge so you hopefully won't make the same "bad date" mistakes of your predecessors. 

BE BOLD
The internet and technology have enabled singles to date 24/7. How do you stand out and become more than just another first and last date casualty? Skip the boring, run-of-the-mill first date questions that the masses engage in and mix it up. Find out his/her celebrity crush. If they could only eat at one restaurant for the rest of their live where it would be, what they would or wouldn't do for a million dollars. This line of dialogue is open ended, flirty and fun and will allow you to gain more insight into your potential mate.

PLAY GAMES
If your date is a movie buff or geography guru, rather than just talking about the subject turn it into a game. I.e. pick an actor or actress and go back and forth naming their movies until one of you can't come up with one. Whoever lasts the longest wins and gets a massage and/or the loser picks up the next round of drinks. A little competition is healthy for a relationship, especially a new one. It will help you gauge how intelligent, creative, competitive, collaborative and most importantly, what type of winner/or loser your date is. It also creates a the good type of "sexual tension" that will help secure you a second date. 
Jul
15
Title:  First Date Topics And Techniques That Will Secure You A Second Date
Author:   amguesa21  |  Location: NEW YORK
Date: 07/15/2017      

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amguesa21
Wanted to share some of my tips and techniques for turning up the heat on a first date. Trust me these work!

GET DOWN TO IT
Life is too short for there to be taboo topics. I say put it all out there so as not to waste time. You want passion in your relationship? Talk about topics of substance. Religious views, politics, sexual preferences...everything you were always told NOT to talk about on a first date are the conversation topics that will really enable you to see if you're going to be compatible with and potentially connect with a person in the long run. Why wait till the third or fourth date to find out that they voted for Trump? Seriously, do you have that kind of time to waste?

SHARE DATING "HORROR STORIES"
You don't necessarily want to dive into your recent divorce or how your college sweetheart broke your heart and you're still in therapy trying to get over it. However, relating on a "single in the city" level is a good thing. If you met online ask what their worst online date was. I'm sure you've had your share of bad dates as well. This topic should provide much entertainment value and give you insight into your date, giving you the knowledge so you hopefully won't make the same "bad date" mistakes of your predecessors.

BE BOLD
The internet and technology have enabled singles to date 24/7. How do you stand out and become more than just another first and last date casualty? Skip the boring, run-of-the-mill first date questions that the masses engage in and mix it up. Find out his/her celebrity crush. If they could only eat at one restaurant for the rest of their live where it would be, what they would or wouldn't do for a million dollars. This line of dialogue is open ended, flirty and fun and will allow you to gain more insight into your potential mate.

PLAY GAMES
If your date is a movie buff or geography guru, rather than just talking about the subject turn it into a game. I.e. pick an actor or actress and go back and forth naming their movies until one of you can't come up with one. Whoever lasts the longest wins and gets a massage and/or the loser picks up the next round of drinks. A little competition is healthy for a relationship, especially a new one. It will help you gauge how intelligent, creative, competitive, collaborative and most importantly, what type of winner/or loser your date is. It also creates a the good type of "sexual tension" that will help secure you a second date. 

Jun
10
Title:  Why Speed Dating Is The Way To Go
Author:   jcabrera1981  |  Location: TEXAS
Date: 06/10/2017      

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jcabrera1981
Speed dating is a great way to meet people. I've tried speed dating in Austin and I've also done speed dating in NYC. I MUCH prefer speed dating to online dating for several reasons. With online dating there is all of this back and forth correspondance that has to take place before you even meet. I'm an efficient person and don't like to waste time. Quite often you'll meet the person you're corresponding with and realize you have absolutely no chemistry with them. Not to mention all of the people who are not honest in their dating profiles. Be it photos from 10 years ago, lying about their age, weight, height or anything in between. 

What is so great about speed dating is that you get to meet 10-20 singles in one night over 3 minute dates. You don't have much time on a speed date but you do have enough time to assess if there is enough chemistry to want to go on a full blown date. It's a really non-pressure way to date and also very efficient.

Speeddating is also a better route for meeting someone than trying to pick up women at a bar. At the bar you never know who is actually single and looking to meet someone and you also have to be very assertive and confident and okay with approaching women. Which isn't for everyone. With speed dating the hosts do everything for you. 

You can meet more people speed dating in one night than some people meet with a year of online dating. Not to mention it really works. I ended up meeting my fiancee through a speed dating event. We've been together for almost six years now. And it's not just me, I've heard about several friends and family members who had success through speed dating events. 

If you haven't tried speed dating and are seriously looking to meet someone for a serious relationship or just new people in general I seriously suggest you try it. Speed dating is affordable, efficient, effective and fun. Make sure you read reviews on the companies you are looking to speed date with because some are better than others. You want to sign up with a speed dating company that guarantees a minimum number of dates and I think dating companies like OnSpeedDating are good b/c they offer really "niche" singles events that give the opportunity to try to meet the types of singles you are interested in meeting.
May
11
Title:  How To Snag A Sailor During Fleet Week In NYC
Author:   amguesa21  |  Location: NEW YORK
Date: 05/11/2017      

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amguesa21
Made famous by Carrie Bradshaw, each year thousands of single sailors descend upon Manhattan for a week of freedom, booze and patriotic debauchery. Now in it's 29th year, Fleet Week is the city's time-honored celebration of the sea services (Sailors, Marines, and Coast Guardsman).  Want to land your own military man in gleaming Tide-white armor? First and foremost save the date: Fleet Week 2017 is happening Wednesday, May 24th through Tuesday, May 30th. 

Sailors tend to be young, super fit, well-mannered, neat and most importantly shipping off in a few days. This is NOT likely going to be a long-term relationship, unless you end up doing a long-distance thing. It's going to be a fling and there's nothing wrong with that. Recognize this and own it.

Here are my Top 5 Tips on how to meet a sailor this Fleet Week. 

1. Location, location, location. Pier 86 tends to be "Sailor Central" and is where the Intrepid Sea and R/V Neil Armstrong ships will be docked. You'll want to stick to the Midtown area in general as that's where the majority of seamen will be. 

2. Check out a Fleet Week Singles Party. We're hosting one Saturday, May 27th 8pm to midnight at Hudson Station (440 9th avenue). Servicemen and women in uniform drink free for the first hour. That, plus knowing that's where the women will be will hopefully have them coming out in droves. There will be icebreakers, complimentary appetizers, music, dancing and if you're lucky...For the official schedule of Fleet Week events you may want to pop into click here. 
http://militarynews.com/app/fleetweeknewyork/events.html

3. Show a little skin. These men have been on a ship for God only knows how long. Trust me when I say they'll be looking for love. Short skirts and dresses, cleavage bearing and/or low cut tops and heels will definitely do the trick. Event kitchy, flirty tops with writing i.e. "My Boyfriends Out Of Town," "Non-Practicing Virgin," etc. will definitely garner warranted attention.

4. Buy him a drink. Forget chivalry and waiting for the guy to make the first move. When all else fails offer to buy a guy a drink. Seriously, it's not like they don't deserve it serving our country and all. The gesture will be a welcomed surprise and give you your "in" for a conversation that will hopefully lead to more. 

5. The "Bend and Snap." Made famous by Elle Woods of Legally Blonde fame I'm telling you this actually works. I've done it countless times. I'll drop by purse on the ground by a guy I like. Sailors in particular are super well-mannered I guarantee he'll pick it up for you, you'll share a laugh and he'll probably even offer to buy you a drink for your troubles!

Bonus Tip
Give him your digits without trying. I developed this technique and it's never failed. Simply walk up distressed/frantic and say that you can't find your cell phone and ask the guy you're attracted to if he could please call your phone so that you can hopefully find it in your purse. You give him your digits, he types them in calls you and BOOM you both have each other's numbers. If he's interested he'll definitely call or text.






 
Mar
27
Title:  The Top 8 Spots/Ways To Meet A Significant Other
Author:   jcabrera1981  |  Location: TEXAS
Date: 03/27/2017      

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jcabrera1981
1. Volunteering at your local animal shelter or food kitchen: It's a great way to meet "good" people passionate about helping others and I know of at least 3 couples that have met this way in the past. Even if you don't meet "the one" at least you didn't waste time and it was for a good cause.

2. Intramural sports teams: There are so many organizations out there for recreational team sports. Get on a co-ed team. Doesn't matter if you're good at the sport or not. After the games the teams usually head out to the local watering hole and socialize. This is a great way to meet a significant other. I know of several relationships that started this way. My now girlfriend took it to the extreme and played on an all men's volleyball team with Urban Volleyball to increase the odds of meeting someone. Glad that didn't end up working out. 

3. Lyft Ridesharing: If you're single, why not share your ride versus take your own taxi or car service? You'll save money and maybe hit it off with the guy/gal you're sharing the ride with. Win-win.

4. Coffee Shops/We Work: These are both great spots to potentially meet someone. If you're a regular at either of these places it will create a sense of familiarity amongst other regulars and make it more likely someone will engage you in conversation. This is a great spot to meet fellow single entrepreneurs. When the offer to buy you a coffee you've got yourself and instant date.

5. Speed Dating / Singles Parties: These are better than bars because you know everyone in attendance is looking to meet someone if not only for the night. There are fun icebreakers and activities that help facilitate conversation. These are better than dating apps as you get to check out the "merchandise" in real time and in person. We have hundreds of singles that find their significant other through our singles events. While they may not always end up meeting "the one," they will sometimes meet a wingwoman or wingman that will end up introducing them to their future partner. And with OnSpeedDating's "themed" events...Fireman Parties, Size Matter's Speed Dating for women that like tall men, "Have Passport, Will Travel," there is something for everyone and you're more likely to hit it off with the singles in attendance if you go to an event that caters to your preferences.

6. Quiet Clubbing: These silent disco parties are a great place to meet new people and socialize. While not everyone in attendance is single, you never know who you'll meet. Unlike the club scene there is not blaring music so you can actually have a conversation without screaming at the top of your lungs. Based on what color the LED lights of someone's headset are you can tell if they have similar music tastes and quickly strike up a conversation. 

7. The Park: I know a woman who met her now husband of five years by just laying out a blanket out at Sheep's Meadow in Central Park and putting out a nice spread of food. She was super friendly and approachable looking. When a cute guy would walk buy she'd ask them if they wanted to join her for a quick nosh. Definitely paid off. 

8. Karaoke: I know a few couples who have met doing karaoke at The Watering Hole. This is a great way to meet a significant other. Simply pick a great duet song and approach any individuals you're interested in to sing the male/female part. When you sing together you'll get a sense if you have chemistry and if they like you, you guys will definitely be together for more than just one song.







 

Mar
1
Title:  Top 10 Dating Profile Red Flags Women Want To Avoid At All Costs
Author:   amguesa21  |  Location: NEW YORK
Date: 03/01/2017      

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amguesa21
Ladies, check out my top ten dating profile red flags. Knowing to click "next" after seeing one of these will save you a lot of time and pain. Men, don't be these guys!

1.  Hat Trick

If a guy's profile only shows pictures of him wearing a cap/hat, don't just assume that is his favorite hat or that all of his photos must have been taken from the same outing. In the "physical description" section under hair color he likely answered "ask me later." A lot of bald guys are hot, but what's not hot is a self-loathing, insecure man hiding under his hat.   

2. "Model" Citizen
Avoid a guy that talks about how he does some "modeling/acting on the side," is a "former model/personal trainer," or any variation of having once been "a super successful model". They either feel that's all they have going for them is their looks, are living in the past, or they're not looking their best these days and are hoping that mentioning they used to model will make them appear hotter.

3.  CAPITAL OFFENSE
A GUY THAT WRITES HIS ENTIRE PROFILE IN ALL CAPS SHOULD BE AVOIDED AT ALL COSTS. I.E. "I'M JUST YOUR EVERYDAY PEOPLE AND WOULD LOVE TO MEET SOMEONE SEXY AND DOWN TO EARTH." UH, CAPITAL HELL TO THE NO. IT'S AS IF THEY'RE OVERCOMPENSATING WITH LARGE FONT FOR THEIR SMALL INTELLECTUAL CAPACITY, OR WORSE, MAYBE SOMETHING ELSE. 

4. "Killer" Profile
If a guy's profile pic even remotely resembles Jeffrey Dahmer, to the point where you are seriously questioning if it is actually him or perhaps a second cousin, you might want to go ahead and click "next." You know, the emaciated guy with the glasses, scraggily hair and a total menacing, pedofile-esque look on his smile-less face. Granted, some people aren't photogenic and look much better in person but honestly, are you wiling to risk your life on it? 

5. Come Correct
If someone mentions they are "opened to the possibilities," have interests which may seem like "contractions," are "emmotionally availabile," and or, get this, "find grammatical errors an spelling mitakes a turn-off," you may want to go ahead and flag their profile as inappropriate.

6. The "Hang" Man
"I'm looking for someone to hang out with and get to know." Translation: I'm not looking for a relationship or to take you out on dates. I want to kick it with you at your crib late night so I can get familiarized with your liquor cabinet and favorite positions. Don't worry I'll bring the 420. Let's just say these relationships tend to be short-lived just like the text messages they're usually founded on.

7.  Humor Me
Avoid guys that find the need to talk up their humor a la "I have a dry wit, sure to make you laugh," or "I think that my most distinguished trait is my self-deprecating sense of humor." They may even go as far as to say "I'm the funniest guy you'll ever meet LOL." Be warned ladies, these are the least funny guys ever. Date the self-proclaimed "funny guy" and you'll be courtesy laughing for life.

8. Fit To Be Tied
Avoid any and all men that say, "working out and staying in shape are very high on my list of priorities." They probably then delve into stats on how frequently they go to the gym. They of course like to do a "variety of activities including hiking, skiing, triathlons, running, biking, etc." They pride themselves on staying in "tip-top shape" and believe "the body is a gift and should be maintained." What they haven't come to realize is that being so "fit" and "big" actually makes "it" appear even smaller. 

9. Lost In Translation
"Maybe should me first by said that English is no my speaking." If you think that was hard to decipher think of how much time he put into perfecting it via his use of an [insert foreign language here] to English translator. Sorry ladies, I don't know about you, but I for one don't have the patience to date a guy that requires subtitles. I've done it once and you just end up smiling and nodding a lot. 

10. Actions Speak Louder Than Words
I get really turned off by guys that describe themselves as "very attractive," "charming," "kind," "honest," "generous," "romantic," "blah," "blah," "adjective," "blah."
Attractiveness is in the eye of the beholder. Post your pic and let us be the judge. And for the rest of it, it should come across in what you say and how you say it. Stop trying to lead the witness! 
Jan
31
Title:  Why You're More Likely To Find A Serious Relationship Around Valentines Day
Author:   amguesa21  |  Location: NEW YORK
Date: 01/31/2017      

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amguesa21
It's a fact...The months of January and February result in more long-term relationships than any other month combined. We surveyed 500 single members on our website and learned that 68% were more likely to consider/enter a serious relationship during the beginning of the year. Why? It's due to the state-of-mind that singles are in. It's true, a big factor in a relationship working is timing. January is all about resolutions and new beginnings and one of the top New Years resolutions out there is to find a romantic relationship.

<a href ="https://www.onspeeddating.com/eventdetail.aspx?EventID=1469">Valentines Day</a> is all the rage in February for couples and singles alike and again leads to much self-evaluation. Many singles give themselves the deadline of Valentines Day to find a date that will hopefully turn into a lasting-relationship. 

While I'm against putting pressure on finding a relationship, I say make sure to get out there for any <a href ="https://www.onspeeddating.com/eventdetail.aspx?EventID=1469">Valentines Day Singles Events</a> taking place in your city so as to take advantage of the large turn-out (you'll see a lot of new faces) and the relationship state-of-mind that the majority of singles in attendance will be in. 

In NYC we have a few great Valentines Day Singles events coming up. On Saturday, February 11th we're hosting our annual <a href ="https://www.onspeeddating.com/eventdetail.aspx?EventID=1469">Pre Valentines Day Singles Mixer</a> benefitting the single cats and dogs of Bideawee animal rescue at Hudson Station. This is a great opportunity to put yourself out there on a large-scale (300+ singles are expected to attend) and line yourself up a date for Valentines Day.

On Saturday, February 11th in Austin we're also hosting a Valentines Day Speed Dating Marathon you won't want to miss.

On Tuesday, February 14th (actual Valentines Day) we're hosting a Valentines Day Speed Dating Marathon at M1-5 Lounge where participants will get to date up to 24 singles 24-45 in one evening.

Here are a couple of tips for maximizing your time out at a singles events this Valentines Day:

1. Keep an open mind. Don't cut yourself off to possibilities. Even if you don't find someone attractive or think they are your type you should still be willing to engage in a conversation with them. Who knows maybe they have a friend, co-worker or sibling that would be perfect for you. 

2. Stay off your cell phone. There's nothing more off-putting or that screams unapproachable when someone is at a social event and constantly engaged with their cell phone. 

3. Talk to women and men. You may not meet your "match" at this event but by speaking with the same gender maybe you'll find an amazing new wingwoman/wingman.

4. Participate in icebreakers. These are designed to facilitate introductions. Some may be cheesy but just play along and see who you end up meeting. Quite often just for participating you'll be eligible to win a prize or free event.

5. Don't put pressure on yourself to meet "the one." Instead try to just focus on meeting new people and having fun.








 






Dec
1
Title:  Top Outings And Events For NYC Singles This Holiday Season.
Author:   amguesa21  |  Location: NEW YORK
Date: 12/01/2016      

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amguesa21
If you're single and living in New York, "the singles capital of the world" you'll definitely want to check out some of these activities, events and first-date spots.

Saturday, December 10th: SantaCon "Ho-ing for charity"
You can't really go wrong with thousands of drunken singles in Santa costumes merrily trollop-ing from bar to bar in the city. And as if that weren't enough, admission is just a $10 donation, which goes to charity. http://santacon.nyc/faq 

Volunteer: If you're single during the holidays you should definitely volunteer to help others. I know so many singles that have done so and ended up meeting their significant other in the process. Give and you shall receive. It's cliché but true. Whether it be a coat drive, volunteering to walk homeless dogs at your local animal shelter or serving meals on Christmas, there are countless organizations and ways to give back this holiday season. https://www.newyorkcares.org/ 

Saturday, December 31st : New Year's Eve Singles Party @Stitch Lounge: This is a no-brainer. If you're single on NYE, you need to be at this party. 400 singles, hour open bar, complimentary appetizers, DJ/dancing, continental breakfast and more. If you're single on New Year's Eve, you're definitely looking for love…or at a minimum, a kiss at midnight. This much I know. I met my man what will be on 12/31, 5 years ago at this very singles soirée. http://www.onspeeddating.com/eventdetail.aspx?EventID=1389 Tip: Get your tickets now and save $50.00. 

A couple of great first date spots you'll want to check out include the below:


Max Brenner's in Union Square: You really can't go wrong with 'chocolate by the bald man.” This really is a great date spot. Gazing across a table of chocolate fondue into the eyes of your date while sipping on a warm “hug mug” of Mexican Spicy Hot Chocolate is kind of hard not to enjoy. http://maxbrenner.com/locations/usa/restaurant-nyc/ 

Café Lalo: This is one of the most famous little cafes in NYC, as seen in the now classic flick “You've Got Mail.” It's French inspired, small, cozy and very intimate. Did I mention they often have live music? Usually smooth jazz or classical music. It's a great pre-game spot before the movies or the theater. It's also a perfect little nightcap spot after dinner. https://www.google.com/#q=cafe+lalo 

Flute Bar: Not gonna lie, I've never gone to this bar on a first date and not ended up making out with the person I was with. It's chic, comfortable and most importantly…lounge-y. They have amazing cocktails and small bites to nosh on. http://www.flutebar.com/ 


Nov
9
Title:  Reality v. The Dream
Author:   JimReese007  |  Location: NEW YORK
Date: 11/09/2014      

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JimReese007
When I was a kid, my dream woman is a half-Asian, half-Colombian gymnast with a degree in culinary arts who is a die hard fan of the N.Y.Giants.  She had an English accent and a Richard Pryor sense of humor.  In my child-like imagination, she was out there.  I just needed to be in the right coffee shop, in the right city, at the right time.  She'd come in and we'd lock eyes. Fireworks would go off in my head and privates.  She'd wink, and I'd give a smooth up-nod and say something clever like "Took you long enough."  And we'd laugh.  There would be passion.  And great food. And gymnastics.

Right. The dream.

The reality is that I got older.  And a little wiser, perhaps.  Waiting for that butterfly-inducing romantic comedy moment was tossed aside with my aspirations of space travel and ninja training.  I met elderly people who had been married longer than I have been alive, and I listened to their stories.  My grandparents met in a drug store in Virginia, back in 1953.  Grandpa was single, Grandma was engaged.  He persued, she shied as a betrothed woman should.  They didn't see each other for months.  Grandma's wedding was on the horizon, and grandpa went for it.  Grandma relented. She came clean and broke off the engagement.  Two months later, she and grandpa were married.  They were together, inseparably, for 60 years before grandpa passed last year.  The other guy probably thought grandma was his dream girl.

Yep. Reality.

So now I guess my dream girl is a woman who'll stick around, even when somebody as undeniably suave as gramps comes along and tries to sweep her away.

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